Here’s something nobody talks about when it comes to business strategy: how much you love yourself is directly tied to how much money you make. I know — that sounds like something you’d see on a motivational poster. But stay with me, because I’m not talking about bubble baths and self-care Sundays. I’m talking about the real, sometimes uncomfortable work of honoring what you actually want, making decisions that don’t betray you, and stopping the constant war you’re waging with yourself. I recorded this episode on Galentine’s Day, fresh off a donut breakfast with my three girls, and I couldn’t stop thinking: if we showed our businesses — and ourselves — even half the love we pour into the people we care about most, everything would change.
So let’s get into it. Here are 7 specific ways to love yourself into more success this year.
1. Be Honest With Yourself About What You Actually Want
This sounds deceptively simple. But I see it all the time — women who won’t let themselves admit what they truly want because either they don’t believe it’s possible, or they know that saying it out loud means they’d have to own it. And then not going after it becomes a choice. Getting clear on what you want isn’t about wishful thinking. It’s about getting honest about how you want to feel, and then asking yourself: what does my life need to look like to feel that way? That’s where it gets real. Journal it. Don’t edit yourself. The foundation of truly loving yourself starts with radical honesty about what you want — not the safe, watered-down version.
2. Stop Making Decisions Through the Lens of Fear
How many of your decisions are actually rooted in avoidance? You say yes when you want to say no because you’re scared of an awkward conversation. You stretch your scope because you’re terrified the client will leave. You hold back because you’re afraid of what might happen if you don’t. That’s not strategy — that’s fear running your business. Every small betrayal adds up. When you make decisions from scarcity and self-protection instead of clarity and confidence, you’re not loving yourself. You’re managing everyone else’s comfort at your own expense. Start noticing when fear is in the driver’s seat and ask yourself: is this actually what I want to do, or am I just trying to avoid something?
3. Let Go of What No Longer Serves You
Just because something worked three years ago doesn’t mean you’re obligated to keep dragging it forward. We cling to things — offers, strategies, businesses, identities — because we’ve invested time in them, and letting go feels like admitting failure. It’s not. It’s called evolution. I was recently talking to a woman who was shutting down a business she’d built from scratch because she’d started a new one that lit her up completely. She was grieving it, which is valid. But I was proud of her. Closing a chapter isn’t failure. It’s courage. Give yourself permission to outgrow things.
4. Trust Yourself to Figure It Out
A huge part of why we avoid decisions and play it safe is because we don’t trust ourselves to handle the fallout. So we make choices based on hypothetical worst-case scenarios we’ve constructed in our heads — scenarios that haven’t even happened and might never happen. Here’s what I tell my clients: you don’t have to know everything is going to work out perfectly. You just have to trust yourself enough to know that if things go sideways, you’ll figure it out. I’ve made bad decisions. I’ll make more. But I trust myself to course-correct. That confidence is why I’ve been able to take risks that have paid off. Trust yourself more.
5. Give Yourself Permission to Change Your Mind
Growth is evolution. And evolution means you’re going to think differently than you did five years ago — maybe even five months ago. That’s not weakness, that’s wisdom. I grew up with a very specific worldview and a lot of stakes in the ground. Over time, I’ve pulled most of them up. Not because I have no values, but because I’ve learned that being unmovable isn’t a strength. The most successful, grounded people I know are the ones who can say “I’ve never thought about it that way” and actually mean it. In business, in life, in relationships — be willing to evolve. She hasn’t changed a bit is not the compliment people think it is.
6. Talk Nicer to Yourself
You would never walk up to a friend and say “that was the dumbest mistake you’ve ever made” or “you’re just not cut out for this.” But you say it to yourself constantly, probably without even noticing. The inner dialogue you have with yourself isn’t just background noise — it’s shaping your results. There’s actual science behind this: the way you perceive and talk to yourself attracts or repels the very things you want. I’ve seen it with my own daughter at softball. Walk into any situation already defeated and you’ll stay defeated. This isn’t toxic positivity. It’s taking responsibility for your mistakes without demolishing yourself in the process. You can acknowledge a mistake and still say: that was hard and I got through it. I’m proud of you. Say it to yourself.
7. Give Yourself Permission to Be Selfish
Call it selfish. That’s fine. I’ll wear that label proudly. So many women in business wear their over-giving like a badge of honor, and it’s costing them their growth. I know business owners who never scaled the way they could have because they gave too much and protected themselves too little. And I know business owners who decided: my needs, my business, my family — those come first. Those are the people who built something real. You are allowed to say no to the price negotiation; you are allowed to hold your scope. You are allowed to not be available on every platform at every hour. When you slowly betray what you need and want to keep everyone else comfortable, that is a self-betrayal. And it will catch up with you.
Bonus: Allow People to Support You
Part of loving yourself is accepting that you don’t have to do everything alone. Letting people in — the right people, the right support — isn’t a weakness. It’s one of the most strategic and loving things you can do for yourself and your business. Support accelerates growth. Investment in the right help is investment in you.
The Bottom Line
None of this is soft. Loving yourself — really loving yourself — is one of the hardest and most important things you can do as a business owner. It means being honest when it’s uncomfortable, letting go when it hurts, saying no when people push back, and speaking to yourself like someone worth believing in. Your success this year isn’t just about the strategies you implement. It’s about the relationship you have with yourself while you’re implementing them. Get that right, and everything else gets easier.
If you’re done with the hustle and ready to build a simple, sustainable business that generates six figures without you working 40+ hours a week, the Grow Business and Marketing Membership was made for you. Inside, I teach you exactly how to build — or restructure — a business that works on your terms, with clients you love, and a life you don’t need to escape from. This is the support you’ve been telling yourself you’ll look into someday. Make someday today.
